Don’t look back into the sun...

-

The quintessential image of Tuscany has got to be the fields and fields of beautiful bright yellow 🌻 🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻...during July and August this is most definitely a simply wonderful sight.

"A sunflower field is like a sky with a thousand suns." said someone, once...

A Sunflower is the only flower with flower in its name ??....really, does a cauli-flower not count?....and sunflowers 🌻 are the symbol of faith, loyalty and adoration.


Even a beardy, suicidal, ear-less Dutch fella called Vincent Van Gogh liked them, it's just a pity he wasn't any good at painting as his childlike brushwork only managed to create some worthless and terribly horrid impressions on oily canvasses back in the hedonistic late 1880's...probably have turned out better if he had laid off the absinthe a bit too...
I digress....

The scientific name for sunflowers is helianthus. "Helia" means sun and "anthus" is another word for ......Errrr....flower.?....i think that's right?

To be honest, I find the the huge numbers of the large wired heliotropes quite sinister and I don't trust them at all....standing there staring at the sun....plotting....probably....

And it would appear I am not alone...

"Is it normal that I have a fear of things that look oversized, like oversized sunflowers. I like them if they're a normal, but any thing that is overgrown scares the life out of me... my heart beats fast and I feel faint. Two streets away a neighbour has a giant sunflower in her front garden. It has grown to the height of the bedroom windows... freaks me out when I walk past, but most of the time I avoid tht street. Does any one else feel the same way?...." asks some thick, paranoid American...

It's only a bit of Helianthophobia...I tell myself...

..and a quick google search uncovered more fruit loops including this celestial, unhinged individuals phobia which even the Lord Jesus Christ couldn't help...
You guessed it....another American!

But then this one takes it to another level....

....a charming lady who, and I quote "shits her pants" when she sees one...really??... you crazy, irrational fool....American by any chance?

Following this research, I have now developed my own phobia.....Coprophobia
....being trapped in a field of sunflowers 🌻 with a fuckwit that shits herself....

Fear of faeces is termed "coprophobia," a word derived from the Greek "kopros" (dung) and "phobos" (fear).

Get me outa here!!

Don't look back into the sun....a wonderful scratchy guitar track by a favourite indie band 'The Libertines'...turn it up loud!

Wait for it........Yaaaaaaahh!




    Comments

    Post a Comment

    Popular posts from this blog

    Sun comes up, it’s Tuesday morning…

    -
    Image
    There is a great sense of community here and entrepreneurial excellence as, for example, our evening meal meat was purchased direct from the butcher and then cooked on the grill next door and the drinks, bread, harissa soup, salad, tagine etc to accompany came to our table on the street from a small restaurant across the road…3 separate bills but all for next to nowt. As we sat with our morning brew watching the sun rise up warming the bay, the local fishermen set off through the waves for their daily catch. Yesterday had been great fun as after our surfing attempt, we opted for ‘Boogie-boards’ for the afternoon and had more success riding the breaking waves into the shore. Great fun, but when you get it wrong the power of the waves fold you like paper and cartwheel you along in a white blur…Now, the older bones and muscles are feeling the battering today so we are off to the souk! We piled on the local morning bus heading for El Had in Agadir, promising 6000 shops within the walled 13...
    Read more

    Across the water…

    -
    Image
    After breakfast it was time to head off. We have decided to head 30km up the coast to have a look at Cherating.  During the previous monsoon months it’s a lively surfing area but as it’s summer and hot now there will be no surf and it has a more tranquil and chilled vibe. We have booked a small chalet a few yards from the beach, Casa Lena, to unwind and hang out like a couple of old surf dudes ready to undertake some serious beach-front slacking. Across the water is the other side of Malaysia, Sabah & Sarawak and when the tide turned and came in towards us, the warm south China sea was lovely. We used Booking.com for this one instead of sourcing it ourselves but it wasn’t like the photos portrayed, but it will have to do just for one night. Malaysian folk are quiet souls and all seem relaxed and gentle so this place was perfect for us…. That is until…. …the Hells Angel’s hit town! A load of Malaysian lads having a meet up to show off their ….Honda 90’s?.. A perfect ch...
    Read more

    Marrakesh Express…

    -
    Image
      Pinch, punch it’s the start of the month…and the start of another blog! As the barrier lifts up it’s pitch black, wild and windy and the winter rain feels a few degrees above zero as we make our way into the long stay car park at Edinburgh airport to catch the early morning’Marrakesh Express’ flight out to the Kingdom of Morocco. We have between us 3 pairs of shorts, a speaker, sunglasses and a large lump of Mr Zogs Sex Wax…what more do u need for a winter break at a surf camp? This time, we are off to the Moroccan sunshine, spiritual home of the camel and the tagine…that would make a great name for a pub “Il meet you for a pint in the Camel & Tagine”…I digress… A week in the waves should be a tonic…so once Iv been swabbed for explosives by a stern Border Control operative we head for the Duty Free to purchase gin to go with it! Winding past the plethora of perfumeries and scarf-mongers we head for the gate, stopping to frown in despair at society as the baseball capped, shel...
    Read more