Storm ‘George Eustless’, aptly named after the
Environmental Secretariat minister, has really made a mess around here with
conditions having deteriorated all week. From the endless annoyingly lashing
midweek rain to the weekend warnings of an incoming stupidly named storm as
gusts build to ‘very windy’ on the big grownups wind-chart with records
recording that it’s worse than the very old, stiff winds first recorded back in
the blowy day’s of 1764 when wind was quite strong.
The climate change is happening under our very runny noses and is also happening a bit quicker than he thought and us boater’s are feeling the brunt of it.
Waves reaching up to 4 inches were recorded breaking on the banks of the very full Lancaster canal and all towpaths have now been re-classified as ‘treacherous’ by a government sauce.
A 78 year old dog walker was seen battling the winds and struggling with the pooh bags billowing and blowing about uncontrollably, splattering startled fishermen with canine faecal matter, cold chaps who were already struggling to cast in the unseasonably high gusts due to Brexit.
As a swan blew past, The Canal and Rivers Trust immediately tweeted to close off all water-points in case the stupid people decide to ‘nip out for a top up’ and end up wedgin’ their longboats under a tiny bridge and they have also used the opportunity to warn of severe delays to hedge cutting and dredging work as volunteers get re-classified as ‘furloughed’.
As the eye of the storm moves into the North West, the CRT have also urged boater’s to ‘hunker down’ and issued warnings to us to secure windows, hatches, ropes and ‘all that crap and clutter that you keep on the roof’ to avoid flying debris that could include common items such as ‘unused’ life saving rings, massive tv aerials, plastic plant pots and bags of cat litter...
Here, on the mooring a ‘Critical incident’ was declared when an old oak tree up the top o’ the field toppled over and narrowly missed one of Farmer Jim’s best mule ewes but unfortunately took out 3 fence posts and bust his new lick bucket....a local quickly and informatively tweeted...
“ It wer’a big bastard...!”
...and then a chainsaw drowned out the rest....
BBC community news indicated that ‘significant disruption’ had occurred in the southern reaches when apparently a shed roof blew off in London village and townsfolk had to be evacuated to Germany but here in Lancashire, my shed stood firm with felt intact.
Like an old pensioner that prioritises fags, I have been left without power, as my gas bottle ran out, but on the flip side I have acquired 2 trampolines, 6 umbrellas and half a tent..
Amber warning to be updated at 21:00
Ratcliffe Wharf will remain closed until April 2022
Todays track from the wonderfully talented Richard Hawley, finishing off a live set in Leeds and finishing my blog too....enjoy!
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